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20 Lawyer Jokes You Should Never Tell (6-10)

By tiitucker on Friday 18th of October

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10 – Speaking Ill of the Dead …
One day the phone rang at a law office and when the receptionist answered a man asked to speak to Mr. Dewey. “I’m sorry, sir,” the receptionist said. “Mr. Dewey passed away yesterday.” “Oh, is that right? Goodbye.” But everyday for the next two weeks the same man called back and the same exchange occurred. Finally, the receptionist said, “Sir, I have told you repeatedly that Mr. Dewey died, why do you keep calling and asking for him?” “Oh,” the man replied, “I just like to hear it.”

9 – K-99 Problems …
What’s black and brown and looks good on a lawyer? A doberman pinscher.

8 – In Flames and Inflamed …
A man was sent to hell for his sins. As he was being led into the pits for an eternity of torment, he saw a lawyer passionately kissing a beautiful woman. “What a joke!” he said. “I have to roast in flames for all eternity and that lawyer gets to spend it with that beautiful woman.” Satan jabbed the man with his pitchfork and snarled, “Who are you to question that woman’s punishment?”

7 – Double Time …
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo? A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

6 – No Good Question Goes Unbilled …
A man went to a lawyer and asked what his fee was. “$100 for three questions,” answered the lawyer. “Isn’t that a little steep?” said the man. “Yes,” said the lawyer. “Now, what’s your third question?”

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