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20 Lawyer Jokes You Should Never Tell (20-16)

By tiitucker on 2019-07-16 (edited)

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20 – If There’s Hell Below …
As a lawyer woke up in the hospital after surgery he asked, “Why are all the blinds drawn in here?” The nurse answered, “There’s a fire across the street and we didn’t want you to think the operation had been a failure.”

19 – Take the Bad with the Badder …
What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A bad lawyer might let a case drag on for several years. A good lawyer knows how to make it last even longer.

18 – No Offense, Bikers …
What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer riding a motorcycle? The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.

17 – Soul for Sale, Dirt Cheap …
An attorney was working late one night in his office when, suddenly, Satan appeared before him. The Devil made him an offer. “I will make it so you win every case that you try for the rest of your life. Your clients will worship you, your colleagues will be in awe, and you will make enormous amounts of money. But, in return, you must give me your soul, your wife’s soul, the souls of your children, your parents, grandparents, and those of all the your friends.” The lawyer thought about it for a moment, then asked, “But what’s the catch?”

16 – Invertebrates Have Feelings Too …
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a jellyfish? One is a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.




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